Tuesday 5 February 2013

Relationships - A Contract?

From the moment we arrive in this world we start to build relationships with those around us, maybe even earlier, and they can be the source of life’s pleasures or pain.
Whether we like it or not, we need other people – we are after all a sociable being, living and working in groups.
Just think about the many people who are involved in bringing us the food that we eat, the water that we drink, the people who keep our transport systems going, the emergency services.

We rely on so many unknown, faceless people to provide the numerous goods and services that contribute to our lifestyles. Over our life time we have (and form) many relationships - parents, family, lovers, husbands,  teachers, doctors, dentists, bosses, work colleagues , shop keepers, strangers who serve us. Phew - the list is endless. How we interact with each of these people differently forms the basis of a ‘relationship’
If we think about the word relate for a moment, (which is the root of the word relationship), it is a verb. And as a verb, it  implies some kind of action. So then it would be reasonable to assume that in order to relate with someone we need to do something. The origin of the word is from the Latin relate which means ‘bring back’. So on this basis perhaps  we can also assume that  we can expect something back?

And I wonder, by taking it one step further, does this mean that all relationships are actually some form of unwritten contract that we all engage in?

And what if those unwritten rules are the basis of our issues with each other? Because we develop those rules from a very early age, we never really challenge what these expectations are.  

Of course relationships are much  more complex than just expectations we have of one another, (Personality types, beliefs, values, behaviours, filters, emotions etc)  but I shall  explore this through the most important relationship we have – the one with ourselves.

For some people, they do not really take the time to understand who they are, their likes and dislikes, their drivers, and what is important to them. Hypnotherapy is one of those ways you can gain a greater understanding, which in turn will help you, help others...
So how important are you in your life?